Obsessed

I’m obsessed. Completely and totally obsessed with getting pregnant and my m/c. It has taken over all aspects of my life. I hate being like this, but I’m not sure how to stop it. I am always calculating in my head how far along I should be, or what I would be doing this week. Would I be telling my parents, or work. Would I be showing? It makes me sick. It makes me stressed. I feel like I am walking on a tight rope and barely staying on.
I’m obsessed with getting pg again. In fact everything points to me ovulating this week, but my cm is not the best. And I still don’t have crosshairs. Please, please let me ovulate this week. I’m going to do things differently this time, not sure what, but I swear I am going to make the most of it this time.

Other then the baby making/issues, my husband and I just celebrated our first anniversary. We had a great weekend together. But I couldn’t help to notice that something was missing. . .